“That was a close one. I sure don’t know what we’d do without the oversight of our community,” said Len Russeter, dean of admission at a recent town hall meeting. “In fact, we had a conference call with some trustees last night, and, uh, we’ve agreed to turn over all pending names for public review, starting now,” Russeter said, sweating profusely.
“Like I get it, you’re meant to read it as ‘trusted’ or ‘trust Ted,’ but Ted Cruz is such an untrustworthy, lying rat bastard that it was like my mind prevented me from seeing it that way,” said Tina, a dominatrix who requested we print only her first name. “I can't help but read it as ‘truss Ted,’ which makes it sound like he wants to be tied up. What a ratfucker.”